Showing posts with label T. Show all posts
Showing posts with label T. Show all posts

Monday, 2 March 2015

Last Weekend.

First of all, there'll be no language review this week because....well I only did 4/6 things on the list (conversation exchange, reading, grammar book and radio), because I was yet again very busy. The thing is that I don't actually have the right to paid holiday at the moment, because in Belgium you have to work for a whole year before you can take time off i.e. I can only take my 6week holiday for 2015 from January 2016 onwards, and if I no longer work for them, they'll have to pay me in lieu. In reality, what this means that I have to make up all the hours before or after, every time I travel. As you can imagine, I am exhausted from all the extra work because God knows February was more than crazy. Anyways enough whining for today...

In other more important news *drumroll please* T met the fam! We both left our respective cities on Thursday and travelled down to England to spend the weekend with my family, and I honestly was amazed at how loving everyone was. My naturally shy T completely opened up and really made the effort to talk to and get to know my siblings, my parents outdid themselves with all the cooking/driving/spending/etc., and my siblings...gosh, I have no words! They all told me so many times how good/respectful/sweet T was, and they made such an effort with him. At some point on Saturday, I was completely ignored while all the boys chatted football, then later on hung-out around the XBox. Honestly, I was super worried about this meeting and had been trying to put it off for as long as possible, but that became unsustainable because my parents (mum in particular) were really pushing for T to meet them. Well I'm glad to say that my fears were utterly and completely unfounded, as even the English weather cooperated! 

I stayed one day longer in England to rest, and will be going back to Brussels and real-life tomorrow, at least for a few days....I'm off to Paris on Friday for my younger sister's graduation. Hoping I'll be able to get back on the language horse this week.

Have a lovely week everyone, I hope your weekends were as happy as mine!

P.S. Many thanks to Duru who checked on me when he noticed I'd gone AWOL online. I'm fine, and the busy times are (mostly) behind me now so I'm back.  

Tuesday, 30 December 2014

Last Post for 2014....A Mish-Mash!


End of the Year
December was a very busy time for me, as I travelled a bit and then worked/hosted some guests over the Christmas period. I went to Vienna as usual in the first weekend, then Germany in the third weekend (met Jen from Ibibiogirl and visited T's family). Vicky, my Argentinian friend, arrived on Christmas eve and stayed until the 27th when Mr T got here. I was so tired from working full-time  and all the fun I had with Vicky waka dugbe-ing around Brussels, doing longer throat and eating all manner of mede-mede. Anyway by the time T got here, the temperature had really dropped and it even snowed sef, so we just stayed home and I slept a lot. He left yesterday, and I'm back to work today and tomorrow before packing my bags again and heading off, this time to mama Charlie's country (England for my non-naija readers).

My 2014 in Books
I started the year with Adichie's Americanah and it was definitely worth the hype for me. The issues that come with moving to a new country and finding yourself a "minority,"  the fight to affirm or (re)create your identity, doing the adjusting/adapting required, and merging your new culture with your home culture...these are all things that meant I recognised myself very strongly in Ifemelu and the other immigrants. On the other hand, I really didn't enjoy Taiye Selasi's Ghana Must Go. I had seen an interview of the author on RAI1, an Italian TV station, and was really impressed so I actually spent some of my Amazon vouchers on the book. Unfortunately, I was bitterly disappointed. I did not like her writing style one teensy bit.

I however liked Jhumpa Lahiri's The Lowlands, Khaled Hosseini's And The Mountains Echoed, Swallow by Sefi Atta, A Case of Exploding Mangoes by Mohammed Hanif Unaccustomed Earth again by Jhumpa Lahiri, and Adaobi Nwaubani's I Do Not Come To You By Chance. Special mention goes to Brady Udall's The Lonely Polygamist, Rajaa Alsanea's Girls of Riyadh and Lola Shoneyin's The Secret Lives of Baba Segi's Wives which I particularly loved. These books made me laugh out loud, literally  and I really enjoyed reading them. They were (in the words of T about me), "kleine aber feine!"  I also loved Christie Watson's Tiny Sunbirds, Faraway. She wrote about Nigeria in a way that was very realistic. Even though the story was sometimes sad, I felt a kind of connection with the Nigeria she described, it felt neither over- nor underdone... 

Of the 75 books I read this year, only about 12 were written by "white, mainstream" authors, and even then 11 of them talked about "others." "Atypical" situations, places and people, for example transracial adoption, immigrants and immigration, being an expatriate, being Amish, polygamy, Jewishness and the second world war etc. I am apparently attracted to and fascinated by difference and otherness...

Highlights and Lowlights
  • Travelling! I visited 6 countries and 10 cities/town. 
  • Moving houses 5 times between July and November. It was hectic, phew!
  • Putting up only15 blog posts (pitiful)
  • Improving my Italian, then abandoning it for German
  • Going to the seaside once this summer with T
  • Going to a European zoo for the first time (the other time was in India), and visiting the circus, also for the first time, thanks to the generosity of a dear friend
  • Turning 30. I had 3 birthday parties and got many wonderful presents. I especially love my churidar, my alabaster necklace and my Aya de Yopougon comic book.
  • Discovering a good naija restaurant in Paris, then moving. Now I have to find a new one here in Brussels :(
  • Drinking a million aperitivos whilst on holiday in Italy
  • Seeing my friend K after 8years
  • Having an amazing summer with my sisters and friend, while living in another friend's beautiful Parisian flat. I so want something similar when I grow up!
  • Getting my turn at the annual mummy-and-me-only holiday
  • Getting my current job

I am grateful for
  1. Life and health. I turned 30 this year and became a bona fide adult ;) And everyone in my entourage (family and friends) is alive and well.
  2. A wonderful summer. I had the best summer of my life this year with my sisters, a wonderful sister-friend and T.
  3. Christmas with Vicky, which meant I wasn't alone in a new city during the festivities.
  4. The online community of which I'm part. I feel like I have made so many new friends this year! I'm thankful that I discovered the blogs that made my 2014 interesting - Duru, GNG, IbibiogirlNigerian Scorpio, Berry and Pynk amongst many others.
  5. Journey mercies. Not one train/plane/road accident or incident in spite of the many many miles that I covered this year. Truly a miracle, if you think about it.
  6. The most uncomplicated cross-country move ever. My move to Brussels has been ridiculously coordinated and everything has fallen into place so easily...making friends, work, finding a flat and church, getting along with colleagues and even my day to day life!
  7. My job. I love it so so much! I enjoy the work because it's very different from everything I've known up until now. It is really challenging me as a nurse
  8. Progress with my finances. Thanks to nagging from T and him constantly telling me off for accruing unnecessary interest, I've increased my student loan repayments substantially and have started making serious inroads into paying back my debts, slowly but surely.
  9. My parents. They are finally starting to enjoy middle age, this season of their lives where all the children are more or less independent and there are no grand-kids yet. They're taking up travelling again and making plans to really enjoy each other.
  10. My family-in-law. I met them this year and it seems they love me as much as I love them. I even went there alone for a weekend and things went better than the first time when T was with me. I particularly love his mum because we're very similar (it's so uncanny!) and it feels like she's a friend. Everyone keeps telling me how lucky I am.
  11. My siblings. One sister finished her masters last October and did fantastically well; she got 18.99/20 and was valedictorian. She then basically gave her French university the middle finger salute by giving her speech in English. Yep, my sister is gangster like that ;) She now has a place at university for next September to do her PhD in law. My brother is doing amazing things and is going places with his new startup and little company. I feel like this year was a very important one for him in terms of making progress and knowing what direction to take the business. The baby sister loves her course this time round and has really settled into university. I'm thankful that she decided (and my parents insisted) early on that she "drop out" of  last year's hated course,  and take a gap year. She really grew up in the 9months she spent in Paris. As for her twin brother, he is also doing great at uni, working/playing hard and getting fantastic grades. My siblings are such superstars and for that I am grateful
  12. Mr T. This year has been difficult, with him moving to Brussels and then Vienna, but I think our relationship has become much stronger as a result of it. We've both had to make a lot of sacrifices this year in terms of time and money so we could see each other, and it really makes you ask yourself if you truly want to be with the other person.  I know now,  for sure that I love him and would go to the ends of the world to be with him. It's been 2years of ups and downs, but our relationship (and both of us!) has matured a lot. Like good wine, it just keeps getting better.
  13.  Favour wherever I go. People have always described me as someone who makes friends easily, but this is the first year I've actually noticed that it is true....for some unknown reason, people are drawn to me and want to be friends. I spent a lot of time thinking this year about why this is so, as well as trying to figure out what it is about me that attracts others. I'm certainly not the most intelligent/beautiful/cool/fashionable/whatever-attribute-you-like person in the world! In the end I figured it must be God's grace, some special dispensation, a particular blessing in my life, because I know for sure that I haven't done anything to deserve the undeserved and unreserved love that often comes my way.  I am just immensely grateful!

Monday, 22 December 2014

My Weekend in Pictures: Köln and Bad Münstereifel

St. Petersglocke, the largest of the 11 bells at the Cologne Cathedral


Cologne Cathedral

 The Xmas market from the roof of the Cathedral

 The Xmas market or Weihnachtsmarkt

 Supercool toilet at the Café Reichard, glass door which becomes opaque and artsy when locked! I was lucky my FIL told me about it before I went in; some woman started peeing without locking the door (she just closed it),  and I had to mime to her that we could see her through the glass! 

Nativity story in progress. The story is told throughout Advent until the 24th when the final piece of the puzzle is added...baby Jesus enters the manger.

My Weekend in Pictures: Köln and Bad Münstereifel

 At the Schokolade Museum: Shrine of the Magi
Made entirely out of chocolate! 

 Finally met J of Ibibiogirl, so much laughter!

Taking a break as instructed...

 Around Cologne, walking along the Rhine

The Cologne Cathedral

Refuelling after all that walking and laughter with Jen Jen

Friday, 24 October 2014

So I Met The Parents Last Weekend...

It thankfully did not go like this!
After almost 2years of being together, many invitations, and one almost-visit, we finally bit the bullet and went to see T's parents. 

The whole thing started in a very inauspicious manner, beginning with the fact that we got our dates mixed up, with T and I booking different weekends off. Then I made a mistake when booking my return ticket, had to book another one and lost money because the original ticket was non-refundable. And to crown it all, the evening before T was supposed to leave (he was going one night before), we found that that there was an airline strike! At this point he asked me if we could cancel the trip, he said he could change his ticket and come to Paris, but I refused. Initially I felt that if we cancelled, it would take an act of God for me to ever try again. However, 10mins later, I started to hyperventilate a bit, and my superstitious side came out. What if this wasn't meant to be (at least at that time)? What if something bad happened to us on the journey? I mean you often hear of stories where people cancel their plans at the last minute and they end up being saved from horrible fates. I am usually one of the most rational people I know, so it was strange for me to have such weird thoughts! Luckily my friend (who was around at the time) and my mum (who I telephoned in a panic), together with T convinced me to get a grip and move on with the initial plan.

Why was I so stressed? It probably had to do with past experiences. So, let's step back in time (sorry, I'm an ex-avid nollywood viewer ;) )

You see I had done another meet the parents a few years ago with my then boyfriend's family, and the visit went rather poorly. They were Finnish (yes, I like my men foreign thank you very much!), and spoke practically no English. I spoke/still speak no Finnish, and the boyfriend who played squash professionally, had a tournament that weekend. Long story short, I was left alone with the family (parents, sister and godmother who had travelled down from another city!) most of the time, and so I did what I always do when stressed, whipped out my book and started reading. They initially tried to make conversation with me, but we found it too difficult to understand each other and things were becoming awkward really quickly, so I decided to save the situation by ignoring everyone and withdrawing into myself/my book. Not the most polite or elegant response I know, and you can imagine how that went down with them. In fact I can remember the boyfriend later asking me if I hated his family!

So with this kind of history behind me, I was more than a little hesitant to take the plunge this time round. Fortunately for me, things went really well. Beginning the visit with T's parents both ignoring my outstretched hand and giving me hugs as soon as they saw me, put me right at ease. The fact that they speak fairly good English and a bit of French (such a pleasant surprise!), and made A LOT of effort to communicate with me also helped a lot. Even though we were managing fine with the two languages and T translating from time to time, at one point, his dad went to find the German-English dictionary and the conversation really started to flow. They didn't seem to mind answering all the questions I fired at them, and even seemed to enjoy "gisting" with me. In fact most of the time I spent chatting with them, T was upstairs being antisocial in his room. On top of that, T's mum (and dad apparently, although he didn't cook while we were there) is a very good cook. I think I finished everything on my plate at each meal, and only complained to T later that I felt a bit greedy going back for seconds, thirds and fourths! And to top it all, they wouldn't let you lift a finger to help with anything. They kept repeating "you're on holiday, you should rest," so I listened to them and did :) . I slept, ate, went for walks and slept/ate some more. On the last day I woke up to find a hearty lunch packed for my journey home, with a second package containing the German "blackbread" I had mentioned liking so much. I was so touched by all the care and attention, and I actually began to see where my T gets his loving nature from.

The "problem" now is that T's mum (and dad) have invited me back several times. His mum kept telling me that I could come without him, and reminded me several times that Brussels is actually closer to them than Paris! She also tried to tempt me by saying we could do the Christmas markets together with T's sister and have a girls' weekend. I really am tempted to take her up on her offer because I genuinely enjoy talking to/hanging out with her, and I'd LOVE to see a traditional German Christmas market (they live in a small town), but I think it's a bit early especially with my move to Brussels, plus it might be weird explaining to T that I'm off to visit his parents without him....What to do?!

In other news, I told my mum every single detail about how things went that weekend, as soon as I got back to Paris and she became even more determined that T and I visit England very soon (she's invited us both, many times in the past). I'm sure it's because she'd like to reciprocate and show off her hosting skills too, although knowing my mum, she'll go above and beyond because this is like a competition now. Seriously, parents can be so funny sometimes. Although to be honest, I don't mind people competing to show me love hehe!

Monday, 14 January 2013

Ma Vie Amoureuse a Paris 3

December was a bit bizarre for me, relationship-wise. I had just met someone I really liked, yet I hadn't officially ended things with Fred, and two other "past people" suddenly decided to contact me!

Antoine asked if we could hang out. I agreed to see him because to be honest, I like him as a friend, I was curious about why he was suddenly eager to see me, and he was paying for lunch at a very good sushi place. I obviously couldn't decline the invitation; everyone knows Japanese food is my Waterloo! Anyway, we hung out for a few hours, laughed, had fun etc., but I spent the whole time thinking about someone else. Towards the end of the afternoon he asked me out a couple of times, and spent the weekend texting drunk messages... It was really weird that he (now that I no longer liked him!) tried hard to get us to start seeing each other again, but for me spending the afternoon together was very helpful.  I realised I was completely over him, and that was such a relief.

Ben suddenly emailed from the US updating me about his life and his difficulty in finding a job at home. He then informed me that he might be moving back to Europe. I'm not sure what I was supposed to do with that piece of information, but it was nice to know how he's doing. However, but I'm not sure how or even if to reply...

With Fred I kind of felt the relationship was over, since we hadn't seen each other since early November and were barely staying in touch. Yet, I'm a very tidy person, and as long as we hadn't officially broken up, in my head we were still together. I wasn't really bothered about the weirdness of the situation though, until I met H who I really liked and wanted to be with. Anyway, I sent Fred an email (we weren't going to see each other until the new year!) explaining my side of things, and after a few exchanges with him trying to convince me to at least stay friends, the relationship was officially over. I felt really bad about how this ended, to be honest, but I guess it was doomed from the start...

Anyway, that brings us to Hussein :)

One Friday in the last weekend of November, while helping out at my new church with the Christmas baking, I met three nice guys. I immediately decided that two of them could become good friends, but sort of ignored the third one because I thought he was with one of the girls there. Anyway because I wanted to hang out with J, one of the two guys, I invited myself along to a football match evening which happened to include H. (Un)fortunately the Internet TV channel was a bit rubbish, and we had to entertain ourselves by chatting...that my friends is when I noticed him properly! Cute but a little reserved, I thought, so after some Facebook investigation to determine his "status," ;) I asked him out on a date. Little did I realise how easy it would be to fall under the spell of the wonderful Hussein...

H who is 28 (same age as me!) and Christian; who is tall, dark and very handsome; who has the most beautiful heart-melting dimpled smile. H who allowed me to drag him to the museum for the exhibition on Nigerian/the old Benin Kingdom arts, who listened patiently and asked intelligent questions as I showed off my knowledge about Nigeria. H who teases me because I've started speaking bad French, using slangs and gestures which are very French; who once helped me go to sleep by making up and telling me a beautiful image-rich story; who often texts me using the Yoruba and pidgin English phrases he learns by bugging his friends. H who might be first guy with whom I fall in love...

I have promised to keep him off my blog for the most part, but as I think he'll be around for a while, I have decided to officially christen him on here...just in case I ever need to mention him. So anyway, he will hereafter be known as Hussein my favourite Kenyan, alias HFK :)

Wednesday, 2 January 2013

New Year's Eve/Le Réveillon

My sister left for England a few days ago, leaving me home alone. Since I knew I'd be working early on new year's, I'd originally planned to dine solo and then go to bed. However, I ended up spending time virtually with Hussein (my favourite Kenyan!), and it was fun to welcome in the year twice. I may live in Paris, but I'm British and for me the year doesn't begin until the BBC has broadcast shots of Big Ben striking midnight! As usual, having my trusty camera phone to hand, I decided to  record everything for posterity's sake ;)

Ma sœur est partie en Angleterre il y a quelques jours, me laissant seule à la maison. Comme je savais que j'allais travailler tôt le jour de l'an, j'ai prévu de dîner en solo, puis de me coucher. Mais au lieu de ça, j'ai pu passer du temps en ligne avec Hussein (mon Kényan  préféré!), et c'était bien amusant de fêter le nouvel an à deux reprises. Même si j'habite à Paris, je suis anglaise et pour moi l'année ne commence pas jusqu'à ce que la BBC a diffusé les images de Big Ben sonne minuit! Comme d'habitude, ayant mon téléphone, mon fidèle compagnon à la main, j'ai décidé de toute enregistrer pour la postérité ;)

Champagne in freezer = Disaster!
Champagne au congélateur, quel désastre!

Dressed to kill... :)
Habillé sur mon trente-et-un... :)

Candle, lit...
Bougie, allumée...

Frozen Yule Log with Berries
Bûche Glacée avec des Fruits Rouges

Garlic Snails. Yum!
Escargots à l'Ail. Miam!

Dinner is served!
Le dîner est servi :)